My apologies again. It has been almost 6 months since the last note was written. I was doing the dishes when the topic of being friend-zoned popped up into my head. I don't even know how I got to that topic but I wanted to share some thoughts about what I think the friend zone is and how someone gets there.
What is the friend zone? I don't exactly know the definition but I believe it's along the lines of when a person wants to be in a romantic relationship with another person but not the other way around (and I think it is safe to say that the majority of people in the friend zone are guys). Now this note isn't for the people who've been actually friend-zoned. What I mean by that is there is a difference when it comes to actually being friend-zoned and THINKING you've been friend-zoned. An example of being actually friend zone is when the guy tries to get the girl (and by get I mean flirt, chase, wheeling/dealing - whatever these new terms may be), the girl RECIPROCATES the flirting back to the guy but her intentions are purely for just being friends. That's the true meaning of being friend-zoned.
So now, what do I mean when I say "thinking that you're friend-zoned"? Here's an example: A guy likes a girl and tells her his feelings WITHOUT giving her the chase. When he gets rejected by the girl, he will think he is friend-zoned. This isn't being friend-zoned. The chase is the important part here. If you remember from the relationship cycle that the stage right after meeting comes the chase. The chase is what determines the authenticity of the friend-zone-ness... If you've put in the effort into the chase and the girl still doesn't bite, it's probably best to move on before you get yourself in too deep. But for the guys who have liked the girl for the longest time and get butterflies every time she walks into the room, yet don't have what it takes to try to make her like you and gets rejected as soon as you tell her how you feel about her... well, it makes sense considering that she never really got the chase. So, this is the important stage here.
Here's a tip: doing cute things for a girl is always nice (for you and her). But if she's into you, test the waters and make her do some nice things for you too (nothing sexual intended). Don't let the relationship become too one-sided, otherwise, when you find out too late that she just wanted to be friends all along, it'll hurt more =(. But if she's into you, chances are she'll want to reciprocate the cute-doings for you too. At that point, you two should be confident enough to share your feelings with one another and (hopefully) be together =D.
P.S. - To the people who've actually been friend-zoned I'm sorry that things turned out the way they did but I just want you all to know that there are plenty of fish in the sea and that sooner or later, one will bite!
For the people who think they have been friend-zoned, this note wasn't intended to offend. But like I said, there are plenty of fish so don't feel bad just because one got away. In fact, if you can't find any fish in the sea, go explore the ocean because who knows? You might bump into... this guy! (hover mouse over him) ↗