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Welcome to part 2 of The Relationship Cycle. If you are lost and wanted to read part 1, then click here. Anyways, back in part 1, I explained the relationship cycle as thought of by WongFu. They covered most of the concepts in the relationship cycle, but not all. Of course, there are always exceptions in relationships and couples can skip stages and whatnot, but the general trend of most couples follow the cycle.
Anyhow, what I feel WongFu didn't explain enough was the comfortable stage. Sure, they said that the comfortable stage can be a good stage or bad stage depending on how the couple views their relationship but they only explained what would happen if the comfortable stage was a used negatively. Nevertheless, approximately 80% of relationships DO end up using the comfortable stage negatively. What I believe is that there are three most likely scenarios that will continue after the comfortable stage. The first is the scenario is the one described by WongFu where 80% of relationships end up moving onto the tolerance stage. The second scenario occurs when the couple stays in the comfortable stage for an extended period of time resulting in the relationship going nowhere. They are essentially stuck in the comfortable stage and about 15% of relationships experience this. I will explain this in more detail later on. The third scenario is when the comfortable stage is used positively (also quoted from WongFu) and both partners continue to work at their relationship. To show an example of what I mean, here are figures displaying the 3 scenarios:
Scenario 1 (80% of relationships)
Already explained multiple times (also explained in the Wongfu video).
Scenario 2 (15% of relationships)
This scenario shows a strong curve in the beginning but reaches the comfortable stage where the relationship strength doesn't change. In the long run, you can think of this as a bad thing because neither of the two people in the relationship would be trying to make it better. However, if two people find that this comfort is exactly what they want, then they will survive. One thing to note is that this scenario is very unstable. What I mean by that is if both people in the relationship were in the comfortable stage for a really long time and suddenly one of them meet someone new and want to be with the new person instead, the relationship strength of "comfortable couple" would drastically decrease, inevitably leading to a break-up.
Scenario 3 (5% of relationships)
The final scenario is a very rare one but if a couple can use the comfortable stage positively, working together, appreciating each other and not taking each other for granted, then it can be attained. It takes lots of work to build a good relationship but at the same time, it can be easily destroyed. The final destination of couples in this scenario may be happiness.
Other scenarios
Of course, there are other scenarios that can happen because anything can happen in life. There are so many other factors that can affect a relationship and some relationships may not even make it through all the stages. However, this note is for relationships that follow the typical trend in today's relationships. If you have any questions or comments about this note, such as stuff you don't understand, please let me know!
Disclaimer - This note was not meant to offend anyone, anything or group of people but is mainly for people interested in reading my notes to gain a little insight or knowledge in relationships. If consequences occur due to taking advice from my notes, it is your own responsibility to deal with them.
Back to part 1 →
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